Charles Ramsey, found Amanda Berry, Gina DeJesus and Michelle Knight yesterday

You never really know what's going on in neighbor's house. Like Mr. Ramsey here, the person next door you eat ribs and listen to Salsa with may have three kidnapped women locked up in their house.

"Three young women, reunited with their families for the first time in nearly a decade, were beginning to talk to investigators Tuesday about their life in captivity amid reports that the women were forced to endure years of sexual abuse and beatings inside a rundown house on Cleveland's west side." (usatoday)

It's interesting that some neighbors say they saw and heard strange things and called the police, but the police weren't very responsive. For everyone's sake, for society, can we all agree to follow up about the house you're hearing screams and seeing naked women on leashes. If the cops don't come, how about you call them again, huh? Thanks.

- Cory

As you can see in the video, this is a campaign in Spain for phone numbers that are specifically for children to call if they are in a bad situation, and the message seen by people walking by will be different depending on how tall they are. Their reasoning is that children in a bad situation may be walking with the adult causing them harm and will be able to see the help line without the adult knowing. I don't know why I'm recapping a video you probably just watched.

Anyway... It's a noble use of the technology. But, being the idiot that I am, the first thing I thought about was how to use it to mess with people; like putting something really funny that only people over six feet tall can see, and then something really serious that only people under six feet can see. The shorter people would think people over six feet are A-holes.

Or, they could mess with the sexes a bit. Have the divider be whatever height on average separates men and women in a community. Put up a picture of a scantily-but-well-dressed woman in the snow with a guy staring at her. Have the line for the taller people (mostly men) as "Bitches be crazy" and the line for the shorter people (mostly women) as "Men are pigs." And then watch the reaction of men and women as they walk by agreeing with each other.

And these are the things my mind comes up with to pass the time...

- Cory

TMZ got the dashboard video from the Reese Witherspoon arrest. Her husband got pulled over for a DUI, and she was in the passenger seat, until she wasn't.

The end is the best; the back-and-forth between the officer and her husband is just condescending and possibly sexist. It's like they're saying, "I tried, but bitch is crazy" "Yeah, bitch is crazy."

She's just drunk, and sometimes when people get drunk they turn into over-confident, flustered idiots.

- Cory

Apparently there was a brawl in the Venezuelan parliament; it may just be me, but isn't it awesome watching politicians punch each other in the face.

Political tension in Venezuela erupted in a massive parliament brawl that left several MPs bruised and bleeding, weeks after the country's disputed elections.

Opposition and pro-government MPs blame one another for the fight that began shortly after a banner, protesting a post-election ban stripping opposition lawmakers of most of their legislative powers, was unfolded in the National Assembly in Caracas. (ibtimes)

I think our government could use a little more of this in their discussions - like how in a Hockey game, tensions can be quelled by a fight; they're all so tense, and they have no outlet. Maybe if they just got a bit of their animosity out, relieve a bit of that stress. If you're not a sports fan, think of an earthquake.

Our politicians are too polite, resulting in passive-aggressive comments to the press. Let's get nuts with analogies today - our government is like a bunch of 14-year-old girls, talking trash to everyone else but pretending to be civil face-to-face. They need to be more like 14-year-old boys who will duke it out when they've got issues, and then play basketball together the next day. And, like I said, I enjoy watching politicians punch each other. Is that weird?

I love how during this brawl people are still talking on mic throughout. And I have no idea to this day what those Venezuelans were talking about. Truth is, I don't want to know. Some things are best left unsaid. I'd like to think they were talking about something so beautiful, it can't be expressed in words, and makes your heart ache because of it. I tell you, those voices soared higher and farther than anybody in a gray place dares to dream. It was like some beautiful bird flapped into our drab little cage and made those walls dissolve away, and for the briefest of moments, every last man on the internet felt free.

- Cory.

I didn't realize there was so much pre-produced entertainment at the White House Correspondents Dinner; there was the way too long House of Cards parody with Kevin Spacey planning the dinner (which I didn't get because I'm not sure what House of Cards is), and this video with Steven Spielberg and Obama playing Daniel Day Lewis playing Obama. It's pretty well done.

And why is this on C-SPAN; you'd think some channel people actually watch would do better on a Saturday night with this; whatever channel Conan O'brien is on now (TBS? I'm too lazy to google it) shouldn't turned it into a week-long build up. But what do I know, Friends reruns may still be a big draw.

- Cory